Warmth in Family Relationships and social Relationships

14/05/2022

We can divide all human relationships into two categories: family relationships and social relationships. Family relationships include grandparents, nanakas and in-laws.
Relationships are our heritage. Without them life is not only difficult but impossible. Through them we are born, we thrive, we connect with society and the various needs of life are met. The truth is that life cannot be imagined without them. Yes, it is true that if our relationships have a sense of belonging, a fragrance of love, a longing to meet and a warmth of feelings, then they keep life in ever-rising art and happiness. Conversely, if we take our relationships only on a formal level and they are devoid of attachment, love and warmth then our life will be dry and dull. There is a famous Punjabi proverb which says: This means that if we do not interact and fast with a relative, then he has become like a relative, not like.
Family and social relationships
We can divide all human relationships into two categories: family relationships and social relationships. Family relationships include grandparents, nanakas and in-laws. Grandparents' relationships are our first close relationships. These relationships include our parents, grandparents, aunts, uncles, cousins, their children and our own siblings. In short, this family includes the whole family of his grandfather. Second is the family of our mother's paternal grandparents, which we call the Nanaka family. The family consists of the person's grandparents, aunts, uncles and cousins and later their children. After the grandfather family, the Nanaka family is considered to be the closest. After the marriage, the boy-girl relationship begins with a new family, called the in-laws. For a girl, her in-laws become her own family and she has to spend her whole life there. Her in-laws become her religious parents and her aunts and uncles become her religious brothers and sisters. For a boy too, there is a family of his own in-laws - his mother-in-law, in-laws and further their children - a special attraction. This is how this long-winded web of family relationships is formed! Closest to family relationships is our own family a family that includes grandparents, parents, and all their children. Of course, we sometimes associate with other relatives and they also share in our sorrows but our real strength and ability is our own family. The child's home is considered his primary school and his parents are considered his first teachers. So the child learns the first lessons of his life at home. If the home environment is conducive and all the members of the family love and cherish each other sincerely, then the child will automatically acquire good manners.
Respect, authority and love
Elderly people need respect most, young people need authority and children need love. Therefore, it is important to maintain an atmosphere of complete dignity in the family. Adults should be given due respect, their share should be given love and young people should be given opportunities to move forward and develop. In order to maintain warmth in family relationships, it is important that every member of the family has a sense of complete adaptability, cooperation and sacrifice. Every member should think and work for the betterment and welfare of the whole family. If any member of the family becomes a victim of selfishness or mer-ter, then cracks start appearing in that family and the development of the family stops. It is also important for the family environment to be conducive and enjoyable, so that all members of the family can sit together for a while, laugh, play, share activities throughout the day, and talk about new and old things. It is a pleasure to sit together and eat, play a game and think about a topic. Remember that children who hurt their parents in any way or insult them in any way cannot be happy even in their dreams. When a girl gets married, going to her in-laws' house is like a new birth for her. If the mother-in-law does not consider her daughter-in-law as her daughter and daughter-in-law as her mother-in-law, then she is reluctant to set foot in that house.
Development and happiness
Lucky are the people who get love and respect from their family. Such people are constantly evolving in life, enjoying happiness and sharing happiness. The truth is that those who are happy in the house are happy outside and the house is built with the family, otherwise the house remains - a structure made of brick, stone, iron, wood, cement and sand etc. Soulless and breathless! The words of Principal Teja Singh are very pertinent in this regard: Home means the place where human love and affection abound; Where one is pampered by one's mother, sister and brother in childhood; Where in youth the whole world is revived by swallowing, trampling, earning money and where sitting in old age tastes the leisure of all life's comforts in a relaxed way, like a mother's in childhood. It came in a bag. The home is the center of a person's personal passions and individuality. While the influence of the social and national environment plays a role in shaping his conduct, the influence of the walls of the house and the condition inside it also does not work less. On the contrary, the conduct of a human being is at home. This is the mold of his interests and disposition. Sometimes when I see a gentleman with awkward, rotten or irritable nature, I say in my heart, 'This idea may not have got the love of home'.
Trust and support
The marital relationship is one of the most important part of the relationship. This relationship is like 'Ek Jyot Dui Murti' meaning 'Teri Meri Ek Jindri, Unj Dekhna Aasin Do'. One gets hot, the other gets hot and one eye hurts and redness gets in the other's eyes. Selfless mutual love, cooperation and trust are the foundation of this relationship. If there is a rift in this relationship then the life of not only the parties concerned but also their families becomes chaotic. The tension between husband and wife turns the whole house into hell. This is why it is said: 'Where there is no union of husband and wife, there is no need for another hell'. If your mate is unhappy, you cannot be happy. There is always an atmosphere of tension in the home and family happiness flies away. Children's lives become a different hell. Stress between husband and wife can usually be caused by bad language, false ego, arrogance, suspicion, greed or illicit relationship. It is also important to understand that the end of illicit relationships is always bad. For a happy life, it is essential that the relationship between husband and wife be completely pure, comfortable and free from any doubt.
Social relationships begin as soon as you get out of the house. These relationships include the relationships that a human being has with his neighbors, co-workers and friends, as well as with all the people with whom he or she is involved in some or the other context. Sometimes a very close and warm relationship develops between business people and clients, between patients & doctors, and between those who follow a single opinion or ideology. Such relationships are usually based on mutual needs, ideological alliances, or frequent encounters. Sweetness in speech and humility in demeanor can fill such relationships with warmth and one can get heartfelt peace from them. Another very sacred and everlasting relationship is the relationship that develops between students and teachers. This relationship has its own warmth and its own uniqueness.
Friendship relationship
Outside of family but just like family relationships there is a very lovable, lasting and trusting social relationship, the relationship of friends. It is a relationship that gives a human being a unique warmth, peace and bliss. There is no place for pretense and formality between friends and they have nothing to hide from each other. Although friends have to be accepted as they are, it is important to have some similarities in ideas, temperaments, habits and economic conditions for lasting friendship. True friends never slander their friends behind their backs. They support them in all their troubles, never deceive them, and if there are any shortcomings or weaknesses in them, they are sure to draw their attention to them. There is no such thing as rich or poor among friends - when friendships are formed, all prejudices disappear. People who wear the mask of friendship to prove their selfishness can never be true friends. As soon as their selfishness is fulfilled, those eyes go away again. True friends are like family members to you and they are like your family members. Lucky are the people whose brothers are like friends and friends are like brothers.
In fact, good friends are a precious treasure to you. The rest of us know that spring is with friends and fairs are with friends. "... Spring with friends, fair of friends". Once upon a time there was a tradition of exchanging turbans for turbans or Dharam Bhai and Chunni for exchanging Chunni-Wat or Dharam Bheen, which is almost extinct nowadays. After all, true friends have met before and are still meeting. The only requirement is to make oneself a true friend.
Humility in behavior
In the end we see that everyone is involved in the relationship, the only difference is that some carry only their weight, while some carry them with full intensity and enjoy their warmth. Many people look like they don't even have their own. Consider parents an additional burden on themselves; Consider brothers as partners; They don't have time to go to the sisters; Make fun of friends; Neighbors look down on them. After all, no one else sees them as self-righteous, meek, wise, sensible, truthful and benevolent. On the other side are the people who keep their own, love others so much that they too become their own.
In order to maintain and enjoy the warmth in a relationship, while we need sweetness in our speech and humility in our behavior, we also need to make restraint, cordiality, politeness and dedication an integral part of our nature. At the same time, it is important that we learn to understand and appreciate the feelings of others, instead of singing our own tunes everywhere. If we want to respect ourselves, we must first learn to respect others. Many relationships require some kind of sacrifice and some kind of sacrifice, let us be ready for that. Ego, haughtiness, arrogance, stubbornness, selfishness, greed and apathy etc. work to oil the roots of the relationship.
Easy to build relationships, hard to maintain
Remember! Relationships are easy to build but very difficult to maintain. They are as delicate as silk threads, and the slightest mistake or carelessness on your part can tear them apart. Also remember that once a crack appears in the glass, it can be hidden, but it cannot be erased in any way. On the other hand, with proper care and maintenance you can make them as strong as iron chains. In order to give eternity and strength to relationships, it is important that our thinking is positive, Hirda is wide and mind is pure.
Keep up the good work, and keep up the good content in your relationship. Relationships, whether blood relations or social ones, have no place for quarrels, quarrels and quarrels. If we do not wake up the sleeper, do not wake up the fallen, do not celebrate the ruse and do not laugh at the crying, then what kind of relatives and friends are we? Let's enjoy these warmths and make our lives happier by filling these relationships with the sweetness of love, respect, tolerance, cooperation, restraint and politeness.
(Writer is a Retired Principal & Educationist. Views expressed are personal)

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